I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
