Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
