Non-Jews are for practice
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Randomize
