my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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