My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
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