In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
