do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Well I just put wine in my tea
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
