He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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