he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
You were trust falling into bushes
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
