Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
