I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
