the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I am available for nakedness
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
