You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
