She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
