Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
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