and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
