Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
