No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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