No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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