I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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