YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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