How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I need to calm my uterus...
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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