So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
