This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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