Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
