But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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