I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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