My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
