Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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