Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Randomize
