Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
