We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Randomize
