He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
