The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
