I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
