There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize