I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
