Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
