he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Drunk is not a location!
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