Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
