Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
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