either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
