Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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