it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
