Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
We had sex on a dog bed..
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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