So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
