I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
