But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
