Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
