Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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