wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
