she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
