no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Randomize