No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
